


You Make Me Wildly Foolish

by sapphic_ambitions



Category: Percy Jackson and the Olympians & Related Fandoms - All Media Types, Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rick Riordan
Genre: Canon Compliant, Friends With Benefits, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Secret Friends with Benefits actually, Secret Relationship, we out here yearning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-29
Updated: 2020-05-29
Packaged: 2021-03-03 00:34:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,712
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24435949
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sapphic_ambitions/pseuds/sapphic_ambitions
Summary: When Ethan said it had never been romantic between the two of them over the years, he meant it. It'd always been JUST sex. But the way Luke was looking at him right now... Well... Luke was not fucking allowed to look at him like that. Like this all meant something more. Not when that had never an option for the two of them. (Takes place in the Battle of the Labyrinth, between the fight at the Arena and Luke becoming Kronos.)
Relationships: Luke Castellan/Ethan Nakamura
Comments: 6
Kudos: 63





	You Make Me Wildly Foolish

Ethan buckled the belt on his pants. “You know,” He said, turning back around to the bed with his arms crossed. “The whole arena battle was pointless,”

Luke rolled his eyes, but made no move for his clothes. Not like he needed to. It was his room. “You’re just saying that because you got your ass kicked by a fourteen year old,” Luke leaned back casually in his bed, like he was posing for a camera. He somehow always looked like that, like a model who had just gotten out of hair and makeup, not at all like the guy who’d just fucked Ethan senseless.

Senseless.

He chose that word very carefully for describing how it felt to get fucked by Luke. Senseless meaning “lacking common sense” and “wildly foolish.” That’s always how he felt, after. Being with Luke did that to him. That’s why he always said stupid shit afterwards.

Like this:

“I’m just saying,” Ethan shrugged, “I don’t get why I have to ‘prove myself’ to the Great Titan Lord when I’ve been sucking your dick for forever. That should be proof enough of my loyalty,”

A look of vague annoyance flickered across Luke’s face, as if that was the only emotion Luke could spare for this moment. He didn’t seem to have a lot of emotion to spare other than anger and annoyance these days. “Watch yourself, Ethan. We’re not at Camp Half-Blood anymore,”

“We had some fun at Camp Half-Blood,” Ethan’s smirk was wicked. “Remember that one time in the armory? Or that time at Zeus’s Fist? I’m surprised he didn’t smite us then and there,” 

“It doesn’t matter,” Luke shook his head. “You still had to prove yourself in order to join our forces. You’re not getting special treatment,”

Ethan raised an eyebrow. “Sure felt like I was getting special treatment earlier,”

In the old days, that might have gotten a laugh out of him. At least a chuckle. But the blonde didn’t laugh very much anymore. Or smile. Or seem happy. Or feel any semblance of joy. It was  _ super _ fun to be around. Not that Luke had always been mister happy go lucky, but the darkness had gotten palpable. Well, actually, it’s not that Ethan was any better. He prided himself in being an angsty dramatic goth gay. It’s not like there were any other demigods embracing that style. 

It’s not like there were a lot of other gay demigods.

There were rumors around camp, because they’re all teenagers and of course there were. Ethan hadn’t been at camp in a couple of years, he left shortly after Luke did, but he remembered that people had placed a bet on Will Solace coming out. There were nasty words whispered about Clarisse the first time she cut her hair really short. Regardless of how many rumors there were, there wasn’t another openly out camper. So there Ethan was, unclaimed and gay and miserable and knowing he didn’t belong amongst all these happy hetero heroes.

And then Luke had kissed him, and everything changed.

Ethan didn’t really know Luke at that point. He knew that Luke was the head of the Hermes cabin, and he could sense that something had changed about him since he went on his quest and came back with that sexy scar, but they’d never really spoken before. Then one night, Ethan had snuck out to be on the beach, so he could listen to the waves and pray that his godly parent would make themselves known sometime soon and claim him. When Luke found him, Ethan was sure he was about to get his ass kicked. Luke was only a year older than him, but he was still a force to be reckoned with. 

But to Ethan’s surprise, Luke had sat down next to him. Talked to him. Got to know him. Listened to him. Ethan remembered thinking “ _ Is he flirting with me? Am I being flirted with? Should I be flirting back?” _ His questions had been answered pretty quickly when Luke leaned over and kissed him. 

And then there were two gays at Camp Half-Blood.

They had to keep it secret. Not only because they shared a cabin and because they were  _ definitely _ breaking camp rules about doing No-No Activities, but because they were two dudes. But even in secret, it was exhilarating. Ethan felt more like himself fooling around with Luke in the shadows than he did participating in camp sing-a-longs praising gods who’d never given a damn about him. It made him feel like the part of himself that he’d always had to hide had solidified.

It was never... romantic. To this day, it still wasn’t. There was no cuddling or soft kisses or pet names. They didn’t stay long afterwards. They didn’t talk about  _ feelings. _ They fucked. It felt more... necessity. Ethan didn’t exactly have a wide dating pool and certainly neither did Luke now that he was the right hand of the Lord of Time, but they both had needs and they met those needs together in a totally non-romantic way.

For the last four years.

“You done zoning out over there?” Luke’s voice cut into his thoughts. Ethan was surprised to find the corners of his mouth just  _ almost _ twitching up into a smile. Not quite. But almost. “You too busy thinking about my dick again? It couldn’t have been that good,”

Ethan smirked. “Oh, it definitely wasn’t,”

“And yet,” Luke sat up in his bed, bringing his (perfect) abs into the sunlight that was coming in through the window of the  _ Princess Andromeda _ walls. “You haven’t left,”

Yeah, definitely no romance here.

“Message received, Captain,” Ethan said, trying not to sigh. Getting kicked out was to be expected, after all. “Let me just find my shirt and I’ll be on my way,”

“That’s not what I meant,” Luke said, his voice almost... soft.

Ethan hesitated, then frowned. “Then what did you mean?” 

Luke also hesitated, and then shrugged. “I feel like I’ve got one more round in me. You could stick around for a little bit, if you want,”

“What the fuck’s going on?” He asked. Anyone else, he might have danced around it, but he had to be head on with Luke. Theirs was not an emotional relationship.

When he said it had never been romantic between the two of them, he  _ meant it. _ It had always been  _ just _ sex. There hadn’t ever been so much as longing glances across the dining pavilion,  _ certainly _ not asking the other to stick around for a second round. But the way Luke was looking at him right now... Well...

Just because their relationship had never been romantic didn’t mean that Ethan hadn’t been secretly a little bit in love with Luke the whole time. So Luke was  _ not fucking allowed _ to look at him like that. Like this all meant something more. Not when that had never been an option for the two of them .

Luke blinked in surprise. “What?”

“We’ve been doing this for years, Luke,” Ethan said, defensive already. “Sneaking out of our cabin and then me sneaking onto this fucking boat. You’ve never asked me to stay before,”

“That’s not exactly-”

“Luke,”

“You’re making a big deal about this,”

“No, I’m not. Tell me the truth,”

“Do you always have to be so  _ fucking _ stubborn?”

“I'll leave if you don't tell me what's going on-"

“I don’t have a lot of time left, okay?” Luke snapped. Ethan almost took a step back, but Luke had an almost... fearful look in his eyes. So he stood his ground. Luke drew in a deep breath. “I just... I don’t have a lot of time left and I want to make good of the time I  _ do _ have,”

Ethan tried very hard not to gape. “What do you  _ mean _ not a lot of time left?”

“It’s none of your concern,”

“Well clearly, it fucking is,”

“Ethan,”

“No, you can’t just drop something like that on me and not expect me to-”

“ _ Ethan _ ,”

“ _ Luke _ , we have been fucking each other for the last  _ four _ years-”

“I can’t fucking tell you!” Luke snapped again, standing up, getting closer to him, getting right in his face. Ethan tried not to appreciate the view as he approached. “If I could, I would. You might be the only person in the world I  _ actually  _ give a shit about, so don’t you think I’d tell you if I could? Don’t you think that you’re the  _ only _ person I wish I could talk to about this? But I fucking  _ can’t _ , Ethan,”

Ethan felt like he’d been slapped. He said nothing. He couldn’t.... Not if... If Luke...

If Luke was saying that he felt the same thing that Ethan had been feeling since that night on the beach all those years ago,  _ and _ Luke was saying that he was about to die soon...

Ethan couldn’t handle that.

Ethan’s mother was Nemesis, the goddess of retribution, of balance.

Give and take. 

He’d one day balance the world’s power? He lost his eye.

The guy he’d been in love with for years suddenly felt the same way he did? That guy was about to die.

His life wasn’t fucking fair.

Ethan still hadn’t said anything in response, and Luke wasn’t quite meeting his eyes. 

“So, fine,” Luke clenched his jaw. He raised his hand unsurely, clenched it into a fist for a moment before cautiously placing it on Ethan’s still bare chest. He wondered for a moment if Luke could feel the way his heart was pounding in his chest. “I’m asking you to stay. Is that what you want to hear?”

_ Yes _ .

But Ethan didn’t say that. He didn't say anything. He wasn’t sure he trusted himself not to say something wildly foolish like  _ “I’ve been in love with you this whole time, please don’t leave me,” _ if he opened his mouth. 

Luke finally brought those fucking bright blue eyes up to look at him. “So can you stop being a stubborn ass and just stay with me?”

_ Fuck _ . Those eyes were Ethan’s weakness. 

So he nodded. Clasped his hand over Luke’s wrist. Let himself get pulled by the belt back to the bed. 

And he cursed the gods for their divine retribution. 

And he stayed.


End file.
